In the last few days I’ve been going through sort of a rough patch, I took a 2500$ bootcamp with Julien from RSD (Real Social Dynamics), this is a 3 day weekend in-which an instructor from the company RSD comes to visit in your town and you basically tear up the city while he teaches you more about yourself and pushes you 10 times further then what you thought you are capable of.
Basically I’ve spent the last few weeks earning the money for the bootcamp and up until the last-minute I wasn’t even sure it was going to happen (I only took the money from the bank in euros at the morning of the bootcamp), I was scared shitless that it won’t happen and that I’ll lose my dream opportunity.
Eventually December 15th came and I was scheduled to go to bootcamp with Julien right after the free lecture he gives before every bootcamp in each country he visits; I got to the event 2 hours early just in case, everybody was pretty excited for me and I myself was nervous as hell but still very happy!
Finally Julien came, it was like a dream coming true, I was actually going to meet my idol! it turned out he’s just a regular guy who put a lot of work into this area of expertise and got amazing at it.
We all sat down and got ready for an awesome lecture!
After the lecture ended we drove to the apartment where Julien was staying for an intro-briefing before the bootcamp begins, once we got there I was left alone in the car to park it and rendezvous at the apartment. Unfortunately for me in the city of Tel-Aviv finding parking is next-to-impossible, especially in the more narrow streets where the apartment was located.
What ended up happening is I searched for parking for about 25 minutes, I got really REALLY nervous because I just paid 1725€ and I was about to lost the beginning of the first night, and as I was driving I began to turn left when suddenly I saw a free parking spot a little further from the street where I was before I began turning, I immediately stopped to reverse my car but I was so nervous I ended up backing-up into another car (NOT FUN), we exchanged numbers and I ended up paying him 200$ in damages just yesterday.. (this is actually the last memory I have from the bootcamp, awesome souvenir.. I guess).
Anyway I finally found an extremely overpriced parking spot and decided to park there, after some guidance from random pedestrians I finally found the apartment, I ran up all happy and met up with Julien, the other bootcamp student, and the 2 bootcamp instructors that were with us called Moran and Alex (and of course Boaz), anyway I paid in cash and we finally sat for the opening briefing.
Julien introduced us to the bootcamp (“Welcome to.. the bootcamp!”), outlined some basics for the night and what we should be focusing on, after we finished the briefing we went outside to the bars area, we started bar hopping, I was honestly amazed at Julien’s level of abundance and skills with women, it was really unlike anything I’ve ever seen, he basically charmed every single girl who talked to him, I would see this guy making out with girls in less than 5 seconds and it honestly blew my mind away.
We’ve toured the city and hopped around different bars and dance bars, as the night progressed I found out more and more how my idea of approaching a girl was so boyish and how (to quote julien) 10/10 game looks, towards the end of the night Julien forced me to approach the girls with extremely dominant breaking-rapport tonality, while trying to be as boring as possible and only showing authority, he calls this his “fat, old, disgusting, balding, sweaty CEO frame”, my mind was literally blown-away as I was approaching girls simply yelling in the most breaking rapport tonality I could “HEY, YOU, WHO ARE YOU, COME HERE, WHAT’S YOUR NAME, HOW OLD ARE YOU” and the girls would simply melt.
At the end of the night he quickly briefed me about what to do when I get home, he also instructed me to stay in the bar for another half hour and burn the whole room (approach every single girl there), I actually went up to a gorgeous 27 years old Persian girl, she was slightly drunk and all her friends had already left.. She was really into me and my CEO dominance but I ruined it by calling some girls who rejected me earlier in very profane words and Persian-girl got really mad and told me to apologize.. Instead of putting my ego aside I didn’t apologize to them, I tried calming her down for a few minutes but ended up walking away after not managing to relax her, this was the end of the first night of bootcamp..
I was walking hope pretty satisfied, Julien said that if the first day felt a bit intense than days 2 and 3 would be insane, it took me about half an hour to find my car, I got a little bummed when I saw there’s some damage in the back from the accident earlier, I drove home, went to sleep. We met up the next day at the apartment at 8:30…
This night started with a debrief of the earlier night, Julien asked us to write our 3 best sets, 3 lessons and 3 instructor highlights which we noticed. Julien broke these down for me and the other bootcamp student, then we proceeded to learn a physical stack of moves which Julien demonstrated, and finally the very important rule that we must try to get the number from any girl we’ve talked-to for more than 2 minutes before we leave her. We all drank a beer and headed out to rock!
Our destination was a club called Junkyard, we spent basically the whole 2nd night there, it’s a huge club split to 2 large areas, a bar/lounge room with 2 floors and a dance floor room, this night.. wow.. I really have a hard time even thinking about that night, it was basically hell on earth for me.. I was stuck for 4/5 hours at this place literally approaching the same girls 5, 10, 15 times, with Julien CONSTANTLY sending me back to approach them.. this night was basically DEVASTATION night for me…
Near the end of it I was so broken I went up to girls with my only goal being “not bursting in tears in front of them”, I was so desperate simply for a girl to like me(not even sex at this point) that every girl couldn’t help herself but be a bitch to me (isn’t it funny how whatever you’re lacking, other people will not give to you, on the other hand anything you have in abundance, people would want to give you more of it?).
One of the last girls I approached called me a psychopath because I approached her about 5-6 times up until this point, at some point I just gave up trying to impress and just started talking without trying anything, for the next 30 seconds I had the first REAL conversation with a girl that night, she wasn’t even attracted to me but just being able to rest and finally have a normal conversation was such a relieve that I felt amazing. But as luck turns out her bitch clawed her and shoved her elbow in my face so I could not talk to her. I kept trying a bit but eventually just turned around and walked away, still happy that I ACTUALLY got a girl to at LEAST TALK TO ME.. at this point I’m coming up to Julien to tell him the happy news, and of course, he makes a cellphone gesture and points at the girl, this is because I forgot the first rule we talked about that night – “you ask for a girl’s number before leaving if you’ve talked for more than 2 minutes”… At this point I knew this would be one of the shittiest things ever, I came up to the girl, her girlfriend pointing her elbow and hiding her face with it again, I FIGHT for the opportunity just to talk to her, I ask for her number, she starts laughing, I ask again, she says “%$#% off”, I leave…
Right before the 2nd night of bootcamp ended I asked Julien how old was his youngest student, he actually looks at me surprised and was like “wtf.. 21 hehe..”, I was a very proud of myself with me being just close to 19 years old..
Basically this was one of the most horrible nights of my life, Julien put me in the most uncomfortable situations and he forced me to actually face my deepest insecurities and fears.. At the end of the 2nd night Julien instructed me to stay in the venue for another half hour, and soak up the atmosphere.. I remember approaching a few girls and just trying to dance in this empty club and just have a bit of fun..
We met up early at 2:00PM for a debrief and sat down to eat some burgers for the debrief, I also took the chance to grab a picture with the bootcamp crew (you can see it at my website below).
The 3rd night was right after we saw Tyler’s 8 hour Hot Seat 2 (insane stuff), we went straight to the clubs from there.
“Robby, stop, FOCUS”, I looked at Julien as he and the two assistants cornered me, it was quite claustrophobic, “tonight, you’re is the LAST NIGHT OF BOOTCAMP, I like to call this night “graduation night”, you are no longer a boy, from this moment on for the rest of your life you are one of the gang, you are one of us, you will be treated as equal, BUT, you will also have the same responsibilities we all have, that means NO HALF-STEPPING HALF-ASSING SHIT, got that? tonight, you are A MAN, not a boy, a FUC%#@ MAN.”
I nodded, smiling, “awesome!” I said.
“And there is one more thing.. if we DO catch you slacking off or half-assing it, you will BE PUNISHED appropriately, just like we would punish one of us, this means I now give Moran FULL PERMISSION to slap you, pour beer on your head, and grab you by the head and make you suck his cock! you don’t want to suck Moran’s cock right?” (no thank you).
We step into the club, music goes BOOM BOOM BOOM, guys are all 24 and above, girls are all 21 (like in Junkyard), I felt the pressure of the club, it’s as-if when you’re entering the club it’s an actual battle between the club and your brain to see whose boss, either you overcome the environment hypnosis and deliver stellar performance, or the club shoves you DEEP inside your head and makes you act like a little bitch.
I started off with some very physical and direct opens, none of them clicked unfortunately because I wasn’t congruent with them and after being physical I would just freeze up and not know what to do with myself, it’s as-if I was physical like a caveman and the girls liked it but once I had them I had no idea what to do and I wasn’t even having fun..
I just couldn’t take it anymore, standing there in the middle of the dance floor, all-alone, inside my head, after having one of the shittiest emotional experiences of my life, and I was in the middle of it.. I couldn’t help it and I just went to the bathroom, locked the stall door, and just started crying like a little girl asking “why is this happening to me?”, “why do I deserve this?”.. It was honestly too much.. But after a few seconds, I suddenly felt free, I felt like I just released myself from the emotions that were stuck in my body, I went out of the bathroom and for the next minute I actually felt BOSS, I reached my hand out to a girl (hand of god), she just stopped dancing and reached out to me instinctively, her eyes were like a deer’s eyes in the headlights, it was really amazing, suddenly I felt myself dropping out-of-state and I just lost it, of course I got blown-off very fast after that.
When the bootcamp ended and we stepped out of the club, I got the final congratulations, praise and feedback from the Moran and Alex (the 2 instructor assistants) and then of course Julien.. This was honestly one of the most emotional moments of my life, I was standing there looking up to Julien, practically almost in tears, as he praised me for the 3 nights of pushing myself like an insane boss, how amazing it is that I’m only 18 years old and already at this level..
The most memorable quote that I still remember to this day: “You are learning what being a real man is all about, it’s about taking FULL responsibility of everything and not seeking happiness from outside, it’s about GETTING TURNED ON BY YOU’RE ACTIONS and not the environment, you’re well on your path there, congrats”.
At this point I actually started crying man-tears and Julien said it’s awesome and actually cried a bit too, such an amazing moment.
Main things I took from the bootcamp?
Failure is a product of 2 things, not being clear in what you want, and needing what you want to make you happy. I’ve learned that the key to getting ANYTHING YOU WANT in life is basically to FULLY go after what you want, not hold back even 1%, and at the same time drawing your happiness just from the actions you’re taking so that you are not even slightly dependent on external things to make you happy.. This shift basically changed my life, I’m growing by the day.. Thanks Julien, Moran and Alex, also thanks Udi for being an awesome fellow student and thanks for Boaz for being awesome!
Was the money worth it?
In my opinion, YES, not only that but I’m also planning on taking one in the future again, this is truly one of those experiences that you remember forever.